Letter to Self

Note: Towards the end of my fellowship year, all '05/'06 fellows wrote letters to themselves that would be mailed to them 6 months later. I received my letter after my return back to the states in 2007, and have kept it in my wallet since as a reminder of all I had learned whilst an Indicorps fellow.

July 29, 2006

Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road. But you know - you always knew what road you would to take. The one less traveled, of course, but more than that, the one where you can see the fruits of your labor shining bright over the horizon. It seems to be a road that is almost too perfect, too bright, too tempting for someone like you. Except that it doesn't have the American notion of security. No pension plans, 401k, retirement savings around the corner on that path. Just hope for a future where the community is your security and 'carpe diem' is your mantra.

But whatever you decide, whichever path you end up taking, make sure you keep that fire inside of you lit. Keep refueling it. Never let it die. I trust that you won't because all you have to do simple: just remember that when you were in India, you did just that. You could let the rest of the world fall away while you made decisions with confidence because things just felt that right. Don't ever forget how right, how comfortable and how at peace you felt during your time in India. Because it was only then that you came the closest to knowing yourself.

And remember that being uncomfortable is a good thing. A blessing in disguise. Challenge only comes from difficulty. And growth only from challenge. I know something you fear is returning to the states and becoming stagnant. Being in an environment that is not so conducive to your growth because you aren't being physically or mentally challenged daily. But before you give in, remind yourself that you still have a list of 101 dreams you penned in the 7th grade you have yet to accomplish. No. 1. Train for a marathon. (I know you're not a runner, but trust me on this.) No. 2. Try to understand the people closest to you, even if you disagree with them. That'll bring you ten steps closer to being able to connect on a much deeper level. No. 3. Meditate more. No. 4. Breathe. Deeply. No. 5. Start a book club. Theres so much I can add to this list.

But now the next step is to begin listening to your heart. You've lost practice over the last four to eight years in the states, but you're getting back on the right track. You're not quite there yet, but I see it coming. Continue down that path of self-discovery, because if it's the right path, you'll find that it never ends. You'll just be farther along it by the next time you read this. And if you're not, don't panic. And don't try to backtrack either. Just get back to the basics and start listening again.

Christina reminded you yesterday that the biggest service you can do for the world is to not ask what it needs, but rather do what makes you come alive "... because what the world needs most are people who have come alive."

"This little light of mine. I'm going to let it shine. Let it shine, let it shine, let it shine ..."

Your biggest fan,
(the other) Asha
Indicorps Fellow 2005-2006